Making resolutions for the new year can be tricky. We all go for the standards; eat better, exercise more, weigh less and so on and so forth. This year, how about making a resolution that’s a little less egocentric? Good health and a strong body are, indisputably, important. Yet, if you stop and think about the year behind us, and you consider how lucky you are to still have your man, as well as your children, by your side, you will probably realize there’s no time like the present to make your New Year’s Resolutions about them.
1. Resolve to compliment your man more often. I don’t mean tell him his hair looks good, cuz he doesn’t care about that (unless you’re married to a man like mine, and then he cares A LOT). Thank him when he cleans the rain gutters on the house. Tell him how much you appreciate it when he does the dishes at night after dinner. Let him know he’s a fantastic father, especially after your daughter’s soccer team loses the game he coached. Don’t allow those actions of his to go by unnoticed and unappreciated. Because believe me, you’ll definitely notice if he stops doing them, and the best way to make sure he doesn’t is to express the value of his efforts, honestly and liberally.
2. Resolve to put in the amount of work it takes to have a wonderful relationship. Building and maintaing a strong, loving, functional relationship takes effort. The same way your body becomes weak if you don’t spend the time to do the heavy lifting, your relationship will develop fissures and tears that leave it less than sturdy if you don’t put in the time. For some of you, this may mean Mom-and-Dad’s Night Out needs to happen on a regular basis. For others, it could be as simple as choosing one night a week to turn off the TV, your phones, your computers and whatever else might be distracting, and spend the evening talking with each other.
3. Resolve to fight. It sounds crazy, I know, but fighting comes in many forms. What I’m asking you to do is fight for your relationship. Whether that means you say no to the 70-hour project the PTA has asked you to chair or you hash out the nasty stuff you’ve avoided confronting for the last few months, do it. Do it now, do it with compassion and do it with integrity.
4. Finally, resolve to have sex more often, because you can never have too much of a good thing.