Making friends is hard. Really hard. When we were in elementary school we could become best friends with the person next to us at the lunch table based on backpack preference alone. But in adulthood, there’s all of this tricky stuff to navigate – parenting styles, politics and preschools just to name a few.
When you finally find that one other mom who you really click with it’s a huge sigh of relief. So what do you do when your best mom-friend moves away? While Skype and FaceTime, text messaging and phone calls (haha who makes those anymore?) are obvious ways to keep in touch, how do you deal with this unique problem of adult friendships?
- Don’t rush in too soon
Sometimes there is an urge to fill that hole in our heart with a shiny brand new friend. But Rome wasn’t built in a day and neither are good friendships. Take your time forging new connections with the other moms you know around town or moms of your kids’ friends.
- No cocooning
I have a tendency to, well, how do I say it, never leave my house. I also avoid school functions and prefer a good book to making small talk at pick-up. This isn’t exactly a good strategy for making friends. I’ve learned that I need to create social opportunities on my own terms allowing me to be comfortable while forging new friendships. Get involved in your kid’s soccer team, have a BBQ, or host a small playdate with tea and snacks – whatever feels right.
- You’re not replacing her
There’s no duplicating the friendship the two of you had. You’re expanding your circle, not searching for a carbon copy friend. The distance between you will never erase your bond, but it’s time to meet new people and make new memories.
You never know what light a new friend may bring to your life. Don’t let the gloomy days of distance keep you from a bright and friendly future.