Remember the Time Sam Ate Rat Poison?


by | Updated: December 4th, 2016 | Read time: 1 minute

I do. Because it happened yesterday. I had a morning of phone meetings; then I went to an in-person meeting; then I got in my car and had another phone meeting while I drove home. Then, when I got home, I saw Sam eating something in the backyard. I assumed it was his poop, so I ran out there to stop him. It wasn’t poop. It looked more like a pretzel or a cracker.

Me: Who gave Sam a pretzel? Did you?

Sophie: No. (she dances around a little, and then…) That looks like the rat poison daddy put in the traps.

Oh crap.

Sure enough, it was the rat poison. It somehow made its way out of the traps and into the dog. I rushed him to the vet, they pumped his stomach, fed him charcoal and kept him overnight. Later, I took the girls to McDonald’s (that’s what you do when your dog eats rat poison). We talked about what happened.

Me: Sophie, you really saved the day. If you hadn’t been there, I would have thought he was eating a pretzel.

Sophie: Yeah. I’m a hero! (pause) I’d really like to go to hero school. It’s too bad there’s no hero school.

Me: True. If there was, you could go.


Neat!   Anyway, Sam is fine. We caught it in time and the only side effect is that he’s pooping little black nubbins of coal which, of course, he eats.